Ninety miles an hour, One kiss every minute, It's my favorite car, As long as you're in it ......

So every once in awhile, really, really super good things happen. Overwhelming wonderful things. Things that make you feel honored and humbled and filled with joy! I have been fortunate and blessed enough to have 2 things of this magnitude happen to me! Well, 3 if you count anything having to do with cupcakes!!  ;)

First, C-C-W added me into a facebook group with Zecky and Zean. I am so happy to be included in this group. All 3 are some of the most wonderfullest people in the entire universe. I am so lucky to have them all in my life!! We have lots of groups, so it may not seem like a super duper huge thing, but to me it is. I just feel so special to be included in this. They have been friends for so very long, and I'm so happy to have infiltrated!! Thank you!!

And second, ZarahZou asked me to be one of the Godmothers to her newest adorable munchkin. This is a great honor. The very instant I met ZarahZou, I knew I needed to be her friend!!! She is the very first person ever to make me giggle uncontrollably! And it was probably about something really super dumb, like emailing IT to ask about inserting credit cards into the disk drive. Or Break Bucks Scholarships!  Or family heirloom snow globes! We have laughed about so many things! Thank you for bestowing me with this honor!

In case no one ever wonders, most of my blog titles are songs or lyrics to what I'm listening to when I'm typing. What would I do without youtube or iTunes? And why does Stepping Stone by Lari White keep getting deleted on youtube? I've listened to that song more than every other song ever.

It's almost 9:30. I am going to bed. Tomorrow is Wednesday!And I am going to wear sandals!!!! Maybe.

No, I don't care where we go
As long as you take me
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pl1yBCkYKU

Footloose and Fancy Free.....

So I think we have already established that I think I have a near-genius level IQ, right? But sometimes the simplest things just absolutely confuse the heck out of me. Today I was quoting a wind and hail application in Georgia. And I could not figure out how many 1000's are in 25,000. This is simple, basic, 2nd grade math! I can solve complex algebra problems, but I apparently can't add 2 + 2. I spent nearly 10 minutes trying to decide if the answer was 25 or 250, based on some kind of insane logic regarding decimal points and the thousandth place, neither of which apply to the conversion.

5 minutes prior to my inability to function without a calculator, I was leading a training session via conference call explaining the complexities and variations in commercial insurance markets. And on the success scale of 1-10, the session was at least an 11.5. Maybe even a 12. Because occasionally I am awesome.

Sometimes people just leave you wondering and shaking your head. And sometimes I'm the person that leaves people wondering and shaking their head. At least head shaking burns calories!!

I am having a really, really good hair day! After donating nearly 12 inches of hair, I thought it was going to be a long while before I loved my hair again. But today it did exactly what I wanted it to. Whenever I wish it was long enough for a ponytail, I remember that maybe some kid got an awesome new wig out of my donation and then I know I can wait for a ponytail!

Oh! My new shoes. I am sooooooooooo in love with them! I can't wait for sandal weather. If ever there were 2 pairs of shoes that screamed ZENNIEZOU!, these are them!

When stars collide like you and I, No shadows block the sun.......

It's an Elton John kind of day. But then, couldn't every day be an Elton day? Yesterday I listened to a lot of Sara Evans and Billy Joel. I set up my own personal facebook group to post my favorite songs in. I'm the only member of the secret group,  I'm not sure many would appreciate the diversity of my musical tastes. Plus, it's a lot of country love songs....

I have a friend who is going through a hard time at the moment, and I hope he truly understands that I am here for him. I know I can't fix anything, but I can't help wanting to. There are very, very few people I let into my world. I just don't like letting people close., So very few people "get" me. But he does, I think. So, Cupcake, you are very, very, very important to me and I'd do anything for you.

I think I might need to quit watching Parks & Rec because I love it so much and don't want it to end. Ever. I hate getting to the end of my favorite shows because then they are gone. I'm thinking next I might rewatch either How I Met Your Mother or Will & Grace. Oh, these decisions.....

Ooooh!! James Taylor just came on the Elton Pandora station. Must sing along!!

If you always do what you've always done.....

On Saturday night I reconnected with my old bff ZammyZou via FB messenger. He knows me so well, and gives the most honest (and harsh) advice ever. Harsh only because he doesn't tell me what I want to hear, he tells me what I need to hear. And I think I need that sometimes. If only things were easy! 

I had a HORRIBLE weekend as far as eating healthy goes. It started out Friday night at dinner with C-C-W. We went to this fabulous hibachi place and the fried rice is so very delicious. This was followed by 3/4 of a bottle of rum and a cupcake. Then Saturday morning breakfast from McD's. And then pizza at night. then ice cream and brownies. And finally taco's last night. It was all so delicious. and so very unhealthy. But it's Monday so I am back on the brown rice and chicken thing. 

I have tried 180,000 times to turn off twitter notifications on my phone, but it just won't work. Apparently I am doing something wrong, but I have followed the directions exactly as written. I rarely even go on twitter anymore, but I don't want to have to uninstall it. 

This morning I hit the snooze button about 47 times too many. I just did not want to get out of bed. I slept super well. Thank you, Trazodone. I could even take a nap right now! 

A Girl's Gotta Do......

So this is what I have been listening to today:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zyr061QCyJg

I wanna know what's on the other side
Of this kiss, that look
I wanna read you baby, like a book

Actually,  I've been listening to a lot of Mindy McCready today. She had by far one of the most amazing voices ever, and her illness was a true tragedy. She could have made so much more beautiful music. And I could really use her ten thousand angels right about now!! Although, honestly, I'm not sure even the ten thousand angels could help!! I just might be a lost cause. And maybe, for a while, thats okay!!

I really want to spend the day painting my nails and watching Netflix. Unfortunately I need to do laundry. And then I need to do my husbands dishes, because he couldn't possibly do them for fear he would hurt himself. And we don't want that, do we??  But couldn't he at least rinse them off?

I wish tomorrow wasn't Monday. I would love one more day away form work. I need to plan to take some time off this summer, but its so hard to go back to stacks of work waiting for me. But if I don't take time off, I'm going to lose vacation days since we can only carry over 30 days. I think I need to take at least 2 more weeks off to avoid losing days. I guess that is what happens when you start the year off with 56 days.

I really can't wait for sandal weather. I'm getting kind of sick of the cold. But I don't want it to be super hot either. The weather is just not going to win with me!

I want my mommy......

Every now and then I have one of those moments where I really, really miss my mom and could use her advice. Today was one of those times. I can imagine that the 50's era housewife in her would tell me to suck it up and take care of my house and home and just do the dang dishes and not expect anyone to clean up after themselves because the mom will do everything. But not everyone can be as good of a wife/mom/housekeeper as she was.

I suspect that the mom in her would do exactly what I need right now, she'd hug me and tell me that everything is going to be okay, and everything will work out exactly as it should, and that she loves me no matter what choices I make. Then she'd go back to 50's housewife role and shake me and ask me what the hell I'm doing.

"Everything always works out okay, because we believe and we hope and we pray...."

Lunchtime.....

Lunch today = sunflower seeds. Why? Who knows?!? Because I'm an idiot??  Because they taste good? They offer absolutely zero nutritional value and a ton of salt and fat. Just another one of my brilliant yet not so smart choices. Wow, do I tend to make a lot of those!!

I went shopping and bought the 2 absolutely cutest, most perfectest pairs of shoes. I would post a picture, but getting the picture from my phone to my laptop requires more steps than its worth at the moment.

I drank nearly an entire bottle of rum last night. (Yes, another one of my famous brilliant yet not so smart choices). Actually, I'm not hungover. I'm just tired. Maybe a nap is in order? Or more coffee and an episode of Parks & Rec. These Saturday afternoon decisions are exhausting!!

I have had a song stuck in my head for 3 days. "When I Think About Angels" by Jamie O'Neal. The second verse and chorus will not go away! I so need it to go away soon! I shall leave you with the lyrics that floating through my mind:

The taste of sugar sure reminds me of your kiss
I like the way that they
Both linger on my lips
Kisses remind me of a field of butterflies
Must be the way my heart is fluttering inside
Beautiful distraction
You make every thought a chain reaction

When I think about rain
I think about singing
When I think about singing
It's a heavenly tune
When I think about heaven then
I think about angels
When I think about angels
I think about you

You make me wanna....

Its finally Friday!! Actually this week has not been bad. And tonight is going to be awesome! Dinner with C-C-W and then girls night at her house! I think I need that. An escape from real life for a while. And a break from all the brown rice and chicken. actually, to be honest, eating healthy has not been completely terrible. But I do so miss cupcakes!!

I can't decide if I should do some actual work or make a grocery list. Or continue looking at this huge zit in the mirror. That's the bad part about exercising, it makes me break out. I am almost 40 years old, I should not have to deal with both wrinkles and acne!

I know better than to weigh myself every day, but I just can't help it. Yes, I have a lost a few pounds. But it makes me mad that the scale doesn't reflect all of the work I've done with exercising and eating right. But I know that the scale is merely a number and the real progress is measured in inches and cholesterol readings. But I want to see the reflection in the scale, too! I've been here enough times to know that the scale is not the most accurate measure of accomplishments, but I can't help wishing. Maybe I need to set up a sticker chart and then every day that I eat well and exercise I can add a sticker? Because, yes, I'm a kindergartner who needs visual incentives!

OK, still need to decide between work or grocery list. I think I will get some coffee while I try to decide if I should do some work while I'm at work.

Just another day, just another blog post.....

So I've become pretty consistent at this blogging thing. Will it continue? I don't know. It's not like I really have anything to say. But it's also not like I am writing this for anyone but myself. Maybe one day I will go back and read it and wonder what was wrong with me? Or maybe I will read it with the sole purpose of amusing myself. Who knows??

I just ordered a book called La Bella Principessa: The Story of the New Masterpiece by Leonardo Da Vinci. I am beyond excited to get it. It's the story of the analysis as to whether or not La Bella Principessa was drawn by Da Vinci. I really don't think it has ever been conclusively determined. But I am so fascinated by the work that I wanted to learn more about it. I don't know if that makes me inquisitive or just a huge dork!

Tomorrow night I am having an epic dinner with my friend Cristin to celebrate a number of things, like how I got a bonus check and a pretty decent annual review. Then we are having a slumber party at her house. This will likely involve a lot of alcohol!! And a lot of laughing and singing. Because that's what we do.

I have, quite possibly, the best friends in the entire universe!! I am so lucky to have such wonderful people in my life. p.s. I really need a pedi-play date with ZarahZou!!!

Hindsight is 20/20 and All That Jazz.....

So, in retrospect, a townhouse was probably not the best idea for a place to live. We are just too loud. And by we, I do not mean me!! I love not having to shovel or mow. I love the lower property taxes we pay. I love the small, condensed sized. But.....I do not love the neighbors being so close. I do not love having to be so quiet. I do not love the other residences of my household being so loud. The pros and cons lists are each a mile long. But at the end of the day they don't really matter, because this is where we live and we must make the best out of it. We are stuck here, this is our home.

I've used up all the internet on my phone listening to youtube songs and playing Bingo Blitz. How am I going to go 2 days without music? I mean, I know I can sing to myself, but I sound so much better when I am accompanied by the background music.

Ooooooh, today I get to eat the brown rice, turkey ham and cauliflower!! I am way more excited than I should be, especially since I am having nearly the exact same thing for dinner tonight! But all these changes are working, and I feel really good, so its worth it!!

Decisions, decisions....

I have a decision to  make that I am dwelling on  way more than its worth. I just can't decide what to have for lunch today. The options are brown rice, turkey ham, and cauliflower or brown rice, turkey ham, and green beans. I just can't decide. Maybe I should post pictures and a poll on my facebook and let the masses decide?? I fear I won't get any work done until I figure this out. p.s. the one I don't choose today will be my lunch tomorrow.

Can two negatives ever equal a positive outside of math and science? If you're making a pros and cons list, and the cons way outnumber the pros, what if you can't focus on anything besides the pros? What if the cons are so huge and so major, but you just keep trying to push them aside? What if the consequences of your choice are so life-changingly huge that you just want to live on the pros list for a bit longer?? What if the cons are so horrible that you can't even face them but the pros are so wonderful you don't want to let them go? How do you choose when there are winners and losers no matter which choice you make? What if no matter what you choose you are not going to win? How do you decide the lesser of two evils? Dammit, I'm just going to go with the green beans today. I will deal with tomorrow when it comes.

Monday, Monday.....

I'm very glad to be back blogging, why did I stay away so long? 

It's just another spring Monday in Minnesota with freshly fallen snow on the ground. I actually had to wear socks today. And a jacket.  Thankfully I've been in an unbelievably good mood for the past week or so. Maybe it's all the healthy eating and exercising?? Maybe it's being back to blogging? Maybe it's just that the stars have aligned and ZennieZou is back!!!

I fell to 2nd place in the bracket thing I'm in. If I wasn't at work I would try to figure out if it was numerically possible for me to win, but that just seems like a lot of work. I don't want to have to work while I'm at work! I'm just going to ride it out and be surprised with the results. 

In a hilarious turn of events, my manager has gotten onto the "ZennieZou gives ZarahZou awesome homemade presents" bandwagon, and he has given me something that I can use to create a most perfect gift for her. Now I just need to figure out exactly how to use it to make the Best! Present! Ever! I'm so lucky to have friends that not only tolerate, but encourage, my wacky dumb gift giving. Thank you ZarahZou for being so fabulous! 

Sunday Sundae

The clock just turned over to Sunday, and I would kill for some ice cream! I am starting a new healthy eating plan, and ice cream is not on the menu. Pants that fit or ice cream? No one should have to make such a hard choice! For dinner tonight I had brown rice, pork roast and 182 pounds of broccoli. With no butter on it. But then I had a bottle of wine. This is going to be a process!

Well, I dropped to 7th place in my bracket tourney. While disappointing, there is still lots of basketball left to be played!!

I started watching Parks & Rec on Netflix. It is absolutely hilarious. I tried to watch it before, but I couldn't get into it. I'm so glad I tried again.

Someone just posted this on Facebook, and it is very fitting for how I am feeling right now. I'm a little bit tipsy from that bottle of wine, and need to remind myself that no good will come from thinking with my heart. I need to be guided by my genius level IQ. Sometimes I wonder how I can be so smart but so dang dumb at the same time?

Friday, I'm in love.....

I have been listening to Pandora a lot, the 80's stations are fantastic, especially the 80's country one. I'm rather sick of the limited selection on my ipod, so being able to turn on Pandora before going on the treadmill is so very awesome. That way I can sing along as I walk. And I've even been listening to The Cure again! In fact, I'm listening to Fascination Street as I type. What a great day!

I decided I am going to again start eating super healthy. I have a friend who did a brown rice and chicken diet and lost a ton of weight (although she didn't actually need to lose any). I so wish I didn't hate chicken. But I'm going to eat it anyway.

Bracket update - I know it's only Friday, but I am in first place! There is no prize or money involved and its just for fun. But it's fun to be in first place for a few minutes =)

All the small things.....

I feel like I am suddenly a different person. One small thing happens, and my entire outlook on life changes. Or rather, my entire outlook on ME changes. I actually RAN on the treadmill yesterday. I haven't ran since 2010. I mean I didn't run for long, only a very small portion of the time I spent on the treadmill, but I did do it.

And then I actually turned on the TV in my bedroom and tried to find a basketball game to watch. I wasn't successful, but I did try. I have not turned on that television set for at least a year. And there was some kind of problem with the connection to the satellite. But the point is that I wanted to watch a basketball game again.

And finally, I actually sought out the scale to weigh myself this morning. I couldn't find it, but the point is that I was willing to step on it and at least see what it had to say.

I think I've turned a corner and am in a really good place.

Is this a resurrection??

I'm not sure what led me back to my blog, but I realized that I really missed writing. Maybe I needed a 5 year hiatus to realize that even if I have nothing to say, I still want to say it. And even if nobody reads it, it still needs to be said. I think I needed to realize that its okay to write for just me. Its okay to do a lot of things for just me. I need to be the most important person to me.

I think I'm finally at a really good place in life. I have terrific friends, a semi-clean house, 9000 lip glosses..... I've accomplished a lot of things in the past several years that I did not think were possible. I ran a couple 5k's, I designed and sewed a dress by hand, I donated a large portion of my literary library, I'm a year and a half away from having all my credit card debt paid off, and finally I've swooned. I didn't think swooning was even really a thing. But it happened. The circumstances are irrelevant to this blog, but it happened.

So now the question is if blogging will again become a regular thing? And I just don't know. I would like it to. It would be nice to have an account of just the day to day stuff. So, I guess we shall see!